What is even more important, but less obvious, is that it is reasonable and open-minded for us to treat our litigants in a consensual and reciprocal manner. During arguments, people open up to gain rewarding benefits such as understanding and truth. If we don`t “play by the rules,” we can thwart this aspiration. As a teacher, it may seem like you have little control over whether a disagreement becomes a “waste of time argument,” but that`s not true. By refusing to tell the parent directly about an issue that is not relevant to the child and is often something neither you nor the parents can do, you can exercise control over how the conversation unfolds. Don`t get caught up in arguments that aren`t relevant, and remember that arguing simply won`t change either party`s mind. (see Teachers must choose their difficulties with parents) What “critical thinking” is to internal thought processes, these “norms of argumentation” are to interpersonal discussion and consideration. Disagreements are disagreements. Emotional connections to disagreement do not stand in the way of the constructive exchange of information. Disagreements occur when you and parents have different views on a particular issue.
For example, a parent may worry about too much homework and raise this issue at a parent-teacher meeting. You, as a teacher, disagree. This isn`t necessarily a bad thing, provided both parties can stick to the topic, identify why parents are concerned, and use the disagreement as an opportunity to explore specific topics that are relevant to the student`s learning. In our society, we often confuse disagreement with arguments, but it`s not the same thing. Disagreement with a parent can be fertile ground for finding solutions to problems that teach a student, but disputes with parents often end in heightened emotions and are overall a waste of time. When ideas are contradictory, there are differences of opinion. If you want to go to an action movie, but your friend wants to go to a romantic comedy, that`s a disagreement. Statements, opinions and claims may also vary. When I say that my grandmother was a sweet woman, and you say that she was a terrible person, it is a disagreement. If the IRS finds a disagreement between your taxes and your actual income, you could get into trouble.
Avoid thinking that when someone starts an argument, they launch an attack. To adapt a proverb of Oscar Wilde: There is only one thing in the world that is worse than being disputed, and this is not disputed. A reasonable argument recognizes a person`s rationality and that their opinion is important. Don`t be too quick to judge your opponent`s standards of argumentation. Chances are you`ll succumb to “defensive thinking,” where you use all your intelligence to find flaws in their views instead of really thinking about what they`re saying. Instead, try working with them to clarify their reasoning. Following the standards of reasoning also has a good impact on our character. Staying open-minded and considering truly opposing views helps us learn more about our own beliefs. When we tell people that we never argue, they don`t call us liars, but there is often a loud puff of disbelief in the air. It is not that we agree on everything, but these disagreements do not lead to arguments.
It is possible that both parties “lose” an argument. The recently announced inquiry into Question Time in Parliament is a telling example of this. Even as the government and opposition try to “win” in this daily spectacle of political theater, the net effect of their appalling standards is that everyone`s reputation suffers. In addition, standards of reasoning are good not only for individuals, but also for groups. They make it possible to approach conflicts and collective decisions in a respectful and inclusive manner, rather than forcing an agreement or aggravating the conflict. Well, it can be a semantic thing. One definition of argument is reasoning: “I would say that the existence of…” “, and a definition of disagreement is a dispute. But for us, disagreement only means that we disagree, whereas an argument involves negative emotions, accusations, defensiveness, blame, anger, tears, alienation, blame, blame, blame, blame, threats, ultimatums, etc.
Surely we have all had quarrels in our lives. Sometimes it`s obvious. For example, standards of reasoning may overlap with ethical principles of common sense such as honesty. Intentionally distorting a person`s point of view is wrong because it is knowingly saying something wrong. A disagreement is a type of conflict, whether between people or ideas. Of course not! Yes! That is an argument. If your opinion contradicts the facts, there is disagreement. In fact, arguments can form collectives. Over time, two fighters can achieve a common intellectual creation together.
As argumentation partners, they define terms, recognize areas of common agreement, and explore each other`s reasons. They do something together. Logic and common sense dictate that when we talk to others, we must be open to their views. We should listen carefully and try to understand their reasoning. And while we can`t all be Socrates, we should do our best to respond to their thoughts with clear, rational, and relevant arguments. So if you`re in the middle of an argument, do your best to remind yourself of what`s morally at stake. Instead, following the standards of reasoning shows respect for our argumentation partners as intelligent and rational individuals. He acknowledges that they can change their minds based on reason. The arguments are slightly different and usually involve disagreement. One difference is that parents attach a high level of emotion to opinion, just like you as a teacher. Parents` arguments tend to lose the initial problem when each party tries to win the argument, and in the worst situations, emotions escalate and one or both parties can become abusive and offensive. For example, at a parent-teacher meeting, parents express a strong opinion that teachers are overpaid.
Not only is this not a problem related to the child in particular, but trying to argue that the parents` opinion is wrong will only intensify the discussion. Thank you for this important distinction! When a discussion starts to turn into an argument (negative feelings pop up), you can just breathe in and say, “We`re on the same page here, aren`t we? This relationship is about meeting our two needs, honoring, appreciating and loving each other, becoming more intimate, connected and closer by solving problems together. “I`m really grateful that you helped me see that this kind of relationship is possible! In every conflict, more and more happens than who wins and who loses. In particular, the relationship between the two parties to the argument may be at stake. Often, the real price is to show respect, even if we don`t agree. Finally, we can have material stakes based on the outcome of the argument. After all, one of the main reasons we argue is to impose our will. We want to convince others to do what we want and follow our example. One argument is another. This type of exchange comes from behaviors that cause cracks and alienation in the relationship.
Driven by this isolating behavior, which, instead of creating intimacy and bonds, leads to the defense of both partners and the feeling that they are from different and often opposite sides, an attitude of war rather than peace develops. .